There comes a time when you have to show people how important you are to them.  Many people will try to take advantage of you and you need to respond to those people by having some fun at their expense.  The one thing you can do to have some fun at their expense is to take everything away from them that you give to them.  If it is possible, you can simply remove yourself from them by not communicating with them and keeping your distance from them.  While they may attempt to act like your failure to communicate with them and hang around them has no impact, their internal truths unveil to them that your presence in their lives is truly vital.

Why should you have some fun at the expense of people who fail to appreciate you for what you truly mean in their lives?  Well, at some point, you have to stop being people’s play toy and begin to show folks that you have backbone.  If you do choose to do something for them while you are toying with them, require them to do things in exchange for what they want from you that you know they really do not want to do.  While they may not do what you ask them to do, you can simply enjoy the experience of them acting like they do not need you when they decline to do what you ask them to do, or you can simply sit back and gain great satisfaction in watching them do the things you know they do not want to do.  Is this really being cruel to these individuals?  Not at all!  They were not concerned with how they were treating you, so do not waste a whole lot of time thinking about what your fun at their expense is doing to them.  You have spent enough time worrying about them.  Take the time, energy, and resources you invest in them and devote them more to yourself and deserving people.

Now, if you have family and friends who have been underappreciating you, then you cannot simply let them continue to do this.  You have to make up in your mind that enough is enough!  Don’t let even the closest family member and friend take advantage of you any longer.  When close family and friends are trying to take advantage of you, you need to reconsider just how close you need to remain to them.  It’s okay to distance yourself completely from close family members and friends.  Let them feel what life is like without you.  They may just learn how to show you they appreciate you.

Before you begin to communicate and/or hang around these people again, make sure they have conspicuously evinced that they learned what it means to appreciate you.  For those people who want to keep acting like they don’t need you in their lives, then let them continue to suffer without you being in their lives.  Continue to enjoy watching them try to scramble to make things work for themselves when they know life is so much more difficult without what you have so generously provided and provide for them.

While it may be an ugly truth you don’t want to face, you must face it: refuse to continue to be people’s fool.  Turn the people who have tried to make you a fool into the true fools. Refuse to be used! Refuse to lose!  You cannot win in life when you keep letting everyone leech off of you and take advantage of you.  There’s a clear difference between being nice and being stupid.  Learn the difference and put your learning into practice.

Antonio Maurice Daniels

University of Wisconsin-Madison