Broken Trust

Memory Will Protect Your Heart

 

Sad Black Woman

(Photo Credit: Ex-Superwoman)

Psychology teaches us to judge people by their previous actions. While one should forgive people, and forgive them immediately, don’t forget their track record. Even when you’ve just met a person, evaluate his or her words and assess his or her fidelity to those words. Unless you have some type of mental condition adversely affecting your memory, it offers great power to protect you from heartbreak. Listen carefully to what people say and closely observe whether they deliver on what they communicate.

One of the central reasons why an individual must engage in close analysis of what others communicate and their corresponding actions is selfishness often enters the equation. People’s selfishness can have devastating effects. Although you cannot guard yourself against all acts of others’ selfishness, valuing the power of memory permits you to diminish opportunities for falling prey to such selfishness.

It’s okay to trust people—just exercise good judgment. As much as possible, make sure the people you trust have a track record that merits trust. Words alone are meaningless. What real evidence is available to help you determine whether to trust someone? If you ask that question each time you make a decision, you will greatly ameliorate your outcomes.

Memory, an invisible best friend often neglected, is waiting to collaborate with you to defeat those who would attempt to do you harm. Let memory guide your thoughts, your actions, your values, your principles.

Dr. Antonio Maurice Daniels

University of Wisconsin-Madison

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Selling Out to Gain Favor

It’s tremendously disconcerting that people are willing to try to undermine people who are genuinely supportive of them and who they have developed a special bond with in some way. Some people simply don’t care who they have to hurt to get what they want. Some people are willing to disassemble a special bond they have established with others just to mollify their own selfish interests. You could have shared information in confidence with someone and that person can be so consumed with selfishness that he or she will not mind divulging that information to others just to gain favor from those who will be interested in the information and/or who can benefit from the information.

Have you ever shared information with another person who was in the same or similar position as you and the both of you exchanged information that was not to be revealed to anyone else? To gain a job, a vote, friends, acceptance, and etc., has anyone ever used this information against you to receive a quid pro quo from those who don’t support you? Well, if this has never happened to you, you need to know that it can happen and it does happen.

When individuals have not accomplished anything, that is, have no genuine achievements, and are seeking to obtain something to requires genuine accomplishments, you have to watch these individuals. People like this just might sell you out and/or attack you to secure the favor of the people who will be judging their record, a record that doesn’t feature a single authentic accomplishment.

If you have ever been sold out by someone, you need to know that this person will not prosper forever. This person is going to suffer greatly for the wrong that he or she has done to you. What these type of people don’t understand is the people who they have malevolently obtained favor from recognize what type of human beings they are to do what they did. When you are willing to sell out your friends, supporters, family, and others who you have a positive relationship with, this means that you have no morals and standards.

Selling out those who are on your side evinces that you are an empty human being trying to fill yourself up through what you sold people out for to get. The answer to ending your emptiness will not be in what you have gained; the answer to ridding yourself of your emptiness will be in eliminating your selfishness.

When things get to happening to you and nothing seems to go right for you, think about the people who you have sold out to conciliate your selfish interests. You better learn that people will retaliate and will do things to you that are far greater than what you have done. If they do retaliate against you, then you have no one to blame but yourself.

Therefore, go ahead and celebrate while you can and for as long as what you gained lasts. Your celebration is going to be anti-climactic. You need to remember that the people who you sold out have information that they can use against you—don’t forget that! Enjoy your ephemeral and nefarious celebration!

Antonio Maurice Daniels

University of Wisconsin-Madison